Hi there! So, I've been missing from the blog for a while, haven't I? And it's all explained in this Instagram post, but in a nutshell, I've been dealing with chronic pain, making it hard to stay functional.
Today, I wanted to open up about the struggles that people with chronic pain go through. It's hard to go through it alone, and if I can help at least one of you feel less alone, then I will be so so happy.
I hope in opening up about my experience, you can gain some knowledge about people with chronic pain. If you have chronic pain, I hope that this comforts you in knowing you aren't alone and that I'm in this with you.
Day to Day
I have chronic abdominal muscle pain, likely caused by stress. For me, the pain has always been inevitable, I just have to find ways to deal with it.
On good days, I have little to no pain, where it is manageable and I can get through the day quite easily. Then there are the moderate days, the days that are the in between.
It all starts out well, but then I feel my muscles tightening and I have to go out of class to student services. On bad days, I have to leave.
This past school year I had a lot of good days, but these past few weeks I've been having a lot of bad days. That's because the pain has spread to my back, but I'm on the mend so I'm hoping that it will change.
Something Nobody Talks About
With chronic pain, I've found especially being a student, there comes a monster. Not many people talk about it because of the nature of it all.
That thing is shame.
I've found in my own experience and among others dealing with this that it is fairly common. Speaking from my own experience, shame has been a constant part of my life when dealing with this pain.
There is this feeling that you aren't trying hard enough, that you should just be normal or that the pain doesn't justify canceling something or having to stay home instead of going out.
It's as if the pain isn't valid. It's a lie, but it continues to circle in your thoughts even though you know it isn't true.
The only antidote to this is self-love. Love yourself, be kind to yourself and love your body. You are doing the best you can, your body is for you and your health, and your pain is valid even when it doesn't feel like it.
How to Succeed
There's no one way to succeed with chronic pain. My pain is different than your pain, your body and your experiences are different than mine.
Just because you have a bad day or a bad week doesn't mean that you will always have this pain. At the very least, it doesn't mean that you will have to deal with this level of pain forever.
You have to take it one day at a time, one moment at a time. Persevere where you can, but also be gentle. Some days you just need to be kind with yourself and curl up with a blanket till it's over.
Just remember when times get rough that there are 365 days in the year, and if you think about all of them, there's bound to be a lot of great days ahead.
I hope that this post helps you, and you can comment below if you have chronic pain so that we can all support one another.
Happy Tuesday lovelies, and I hope you have an amazing rest of your week!